***There are some graphic images below, fyi.***

 I asked Vanessa to share more than what the form asks. I wanted people to know the truth behind breast cancer and like the Scar Project states, “Breast Cancer is NOT a pink ribbon.” When a women is left feeling defeated and mutilated, she needs to know THAT IS NOT WHAT SHE IS AT ALL. She is still as gorgeous as she was before cancer dared to enter her body. Your hair, breasts, and uterus are NOT what define you as a women. The images of her along with the others are a true testament of beauty and strength. I’m posting them because people need to know under that cheery little smile of Vanessa’s, she’s risen through so much anguish. No matter how many times and places they have found cancer in her, she fights it in stride. And most importantly I know she will continue to be the same bubbly, happy girl I met years ago in college.

As I sit here and stare at the adorable image below of Vanessa as I type, I am bluntly reminded that life is so precious and we should indeed live every.single.day sincerely, just as Vanessa asks us to pledge. This girl has been through more in the last 5 years that I’m not even sure what adjective I should use to describe it. And still she stands so tall and proud, looking more beautiful than ever. Well done my friend, WELL DONE. People who feel like they are having a rough day need to sit and have a little chat with you to remind them of perspective. After we had lunch, I felt so blessed. It wasn’t because I was glad I wasn’t in your shoes, it was because your words made me feel so excited about life. Excited about my kids (even though they were terrorizing the restaurant) and our days ahead. Thank you for you encouraging me.

You are a badass and I pray so hard that you continue to keep up your faith and fight like you have nothing to lose. You rock, Vanessa. I’m so proud to call you my friend. I know no words can take away your pain and I’m sure, anger, but just know there are SO many out there always thinking of you. I know you are helping so many things fall into place in God’s plan and one day we will all understand why some had to go through so much while others didn’t. God be with you the rest of this journey. <3

Name of tutu recipient: Vanessa Tiemeier

Age: 30

Diagnosis: breast cancer

Age at Diagnosis: 25

Date of Diagnosis: March 2007

Treatment Center: OHC Ft. Thomas

Treatment Plan: Chemo, surgery, radiation

Favorite Songs: Tumor by Christina Blust

Favorite TV Shows: Say Yes to the Dress

Favorite Website: Facebook

Favorite Activities: play with my 3 nephews

Favorite Colors: green, purple

Favorite Foods: pasta

My Support Team: Jessica, Christina, Billy, Mom, Dad, Jason, David, Max, Myles, Leo

Inspired By/Role Models: Sona, Jolene, Joules, Emily, Sara, Marci, Michaela, Sylvia

What else do you want others to know about you?

My story begins in November 2006 when I felt a lump in my breast.  I went to the OBGYN for my yearly appointment and my doctor felt it too. He suggested an extensive test so I went to get it tested. But the doctor at that time diagnosed the lump as dense breast tissue. Four months later, with the same lump, the doctors correctly diagnosed it as breast cancer after a mammogram, core biopsy, node needle aspiration and a MRI.

When diagnosed, I was only 25 years old and had only been married 9 months. I was kinda upset and couldn’t believe I had been misdiagnosed at the beginning. I was diagnosed with Stage 3A breast cancer. It was on my right breast, and had metastasized to my lymph nodes, so I had to have a mastectomy and I decided to make it double. I also had to get radiation on the breast area and start chemo. That combo was difficult and left my body so different (in pain and no hair and no breasts). I then had a tram-flap reconstruction using my belly skin and fat as my new breasts.

After all those treatments and surgeries were over, I had another scan, and I was declared NED (no evidence of disease). A little bit later I crushed my finger in a drawer and broke it. After my hand scan, they also did a whole body scan. From that, I learned my cancer had metastasized to my bones and lung, so I was upgraded to stage IV cancer. I first had a hysterectomy/oophorectomy completed to try to control my ER+ PR+ hormone positive cancer, I also had monthly injections of zometa for my bones and 2 shots in my butt with faslodex as an anti-hormone treatment.

The hysterectomy left me unable to ever get pregnant, a fact I am still very much upset about, because I have always wanted (and still do want) kids. It was hard to believe that so early into our marriage, I was infertile. Making it even harder was the fact that we are not permitted to adopt now either, due to my expected life expectancy not surpassing the child’s. To apply for adoption and be accepted we would need to have a doctor’s note I would live at least 18 years.

Next I had many headaches, so I got a scan of my head. Tumors were found in my meninges (brain lining) and were pressing on my brain. I had surgery on my head to put in an Ommaya Reservoir for monthly treatments of methotrexate directly to my brain lining. Most recently, tumors were also found in my brain. I had whole brain radiation on my head daily for 2 weeks to attack the brain mets. I also started steroids to help control the swelling in my brain, which was giving me horrible headaches. The steroids have frustrating side effects like skin rashes and puffiness. This time was terrible because I got incredibly dizzy and felt like I couldn’t exist normally, and I often feel confused and forget things.

My latest MRI after the whole brain radiation showed no growth in my brain mets, but also no improvements. I was nervous to consider stopping active treatment and entering Hospice, but it was at this time that my doctor suggested I do. This was the most horrific thought and I didn’t know how to understand it. To me Hospice seemed like a death sentence at first, but in fact it just means you are not taking active treatments but still have the chance to do things, be capable and enjoy life everyday.

While the outlook is not good I continue to Live Sincerely and work on encouraging myself to do good things and live each day to the fullest. In fact, I had a super Live Sincerely party on the purple people bridge in Newport a month ago with my sister’s band playing, and we had snacks, drinks, buttons and magnets decorated with a reminder to Live Sincerely. We also added the Live Sincerely Pledge to the website my sisters and I made, so you can agree to it and sign up. This concept makes me happy so I continue to share it!

Vanessa had a feature on the news about her Live Sincerely party. You can watch it HERE.

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These images were taken by David Jay of The Scar Project. I truly hope you will click the link and feel the strength these wonderful women have. While they are hard to view, they sure inspire me, both as a woman and photographer.